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Healing Sex_ A Mind-Body Approach to Healing Sexual Trauma

A somatic, sex-positive guide that helps survivors of childhood sexual abuse reclaim their bodies, desire, and sexual empowerment by working through the body rather than around it.

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What it’s about

Healing Sex reframes recovery from sexual trauma as an embodied, mind-body journey rather than a purely cognitive one. Drawing on somatics, trauma neurobiology, and decades of sex-positive education, Staci Haines shows survivors that the body—the very site of attack—is also the surest path to healing. Through practical exercises on dissociation, consent, boundaries, triggers, masturbation, pleasure, and intimacy, the book teaches readers to re-inhabit their bodies, tolerate and enjoy sensation, and build a self-defined sexuality grounded in their own needs and desires. It refuses both the shame-laden sex-negativity of mainstream culture and the pathologizing of survivors' coping strategies, insisting instead that survival was intelligent and that pleasure, choice, and empowerment are the birthright of everyone. It also situates individual trauma within a larger social context of oppression, arguing that personal transformation and social change are inseparable.

The through-line

Who it’s for
A survivor of childhood sexual abuse who wants an empowered, pleasurable, self-defined sex life and to feel at home in her own body.
The problem
Sex triggers memories, dissociation, pain, aversion, or compulsion, and the survivor cannot experience embodied pleasure, consent, or intimacy. She feels shame, self-blame, guilt, fear, and a deep distrust of her own body and desires, believing something is wrong with her.
The plan
  1. Establish external and internal safety and build a support network.
  2. Reclaim your body through somatic embodiment practices and address dissociation.
  3. Rediscover desire, pleasure, and accurate sexual information.
  4. Learn embodied consent, boundaries, and communication.
  5. Embrace and heal triggers by moving into and through them, feeling the emotions.
The payoff
An embodied, self-defined, pleasurable sex life grounded in your own needs and desires. · The ability to know and communicate boundaries, say yes, no, and maybe freely. · Freedom from the control of triggers, shame, and self-blame.

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